How many people do you meet in a lifetime?
10,000? 50,000? 100,000?
It depends. If your work is an isolated scientist doing experiments alone, you would meet 73,000 people. That is, if you meet 3 people a day for 67 years. Count 1 off those three, for the friends you meet at school for 10 or 11 years.
But I believe you meet more people especially if you work in PAGCOR or in Insurance. Say hi to me: you have added one more to your list. You are probably meeting 400,000 to 3 Million People in our own lifetimes.
It is crucial then that we communicate with people and collabrate with them. This is what I call Interdependence. It is no secret said Dale Carnegie, a writer on leadership, that people who are able to work happily and efficiently with other people are the most successful.
Interdependence is the process of working collaboratively with a group of people in order to achieve a goal. Interdependence or Teamwork is a crucial part of a business, as it is often necessary for colleagues to work well together, trying their best in any circumstance.
We can all work alone. But success in any endeavor is vitally linked to your ability to lead teams and empower them to become interdependent. We can see this in Football where the Azkals brought us to the semifinals. No person has ever won a World Cup alone. Even individual games like golf, need a person to relate with a mentor, his coach.
Tonight I will share with you 5 Values of Interdependence. But before a person can become Interdependent, he or she should know how to be independent, “know how to to care of himself.”
These are the 6 Values of Interdependence, Three of which are geared to towards Independence.
Values of Interdependence:
1. Self Starting.
Being proactive means taking initiative, not waiting for others to act first, and being responsible for what you do. The opposite of proactive is reactive. Reactive people react to what goes on around them. Proactive people act based on principles.
Circle of Influence
Imagine a circle within a circle. The inner circle is your circle of influence and the outer circle is your circle of concern. This means that many things which you are concerned about you cannot influence. Yet there are many things which you are concerned about which you can influence. Reactive people focus on their circle of concern. Proactive people focus on their circle of influence. Being proactive also increases your circle of influence.
2. Goal Setting.
All Things Are Created Twice. It begins in the mind, and then created in the real world. As an architect, I create plans or designs. Only then can it be implemented in the Construction Site.
The carpenter’s rule is “measure twice, cut once.” So do you have a plan?
Steven Covey in his book “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” tells us to “Begin with the end in Mind.” He also establishes this principle by Clarifying our Values and Principles.”
Correct principles do not change. We can depend on them. That is why covey encouraged us to “create our own Personal Mission Statement.”
Do you know where you are going?
It is funny to find people with noble goals and dreams but are always moving in circles because they don’t know how to prioritize.
Steven Covey in his Book “First Things First” shared that a Businessman is having problems in his business and don’t know where to start. He told him, “Sit down and write down the 3 most important things you need to to do day and don’t leave until you finish them. Do that and share this to all you people.Then come back to me in three months and pay me for what you think its worth.” The man came back and payed him $50,000 and never came back since.
Now, we have finished the First Three Values, when you practice these 3, you can be Independent and not need someone to tell you what to do. Let’s go the the last two, which will deal with how we can relate and collaborate with people.
4. Think Win/Win
Any human relationship is based on give and take. Any relationship that doesn’t follow this rule is poing to be strained and limited in its productivity.
Have you ever felt cheated? Have you bought some Bananas and when you go home, discovered that you didn’t get what you paid for? This is how it feels on our end. If we apply this to our personal relationships, our friendships will become healthier.
We are always working on Win-Lose. We find deals where we win and our friend loses. But these relationships don’t last. whenever you require something of somebody, please think how that person can benefit. He will be happy to do this for you.
Wonder why your friends never go back?
5. Understand Others.
The last one is easier said than done:”Seek First to Understand then be understood.” Any conflicts from any relationship stems from an unwillingness to understand other people.
It is easy to take our Perspective, it is nobler to listen and understand other people.
Do you judge before you listen?
In this life, groups will have more results that one person easily. Imagine what results whole nations can produce. That is collaboration.
John Maxwell, in his book Qualities of a Team Player, told of a story in World War II, about 200 Prisoners that collaborated to the escape of 76 prisoners. The biggest, boldest escape plan ever created. The Plan is to dig up 103 meters of Tunnel 8 meters below the ground. Following the escape, the Germans took an inventory of the camp and found out just how extensive the operation had been. 4,000 bed boards had gone missing, as well as the complete disappearance of 90 double bunk beds, 635 mattresses, 192 bed covers, 161 pillow cases, 52 20-man tables, 10 single tables, 34 chairs, 76 benches, 1,212 bed bolsters, 1,370 beading battens, 1219 knives, 478 spoons, 582 forks, 69 lamps, 246 water cans, 30 shovels, 1,000 feet (300 m) of electric wire, 600 feet (180 m) of rope, and 3424 towels. 1,700 blankets had been used, along with more than 1,400 Klim cans.
You can read about Interdependence from Steven Covey “Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” and “First Things First”. John Maxwell’s Books include “Essential Qualities of a Team Player.”
Collaboration is beyond cooperation.
Interdependence. When people come together with the right purpose, in unity, sacrifice, brotherhood and mutual assistance, no force or power on Earth could stop them. This is the Power of Interdepedence.
Delivered on November 11, 2011
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thanks to my Colleagues at Barangay Toastmasters. ☺